Feeling Sorry For Yourself & Fasting Don’t Mix

water 1

My cucumber water was no match for my stomach. There just wasn’t enough water to keep hunger at bay.

Well my scheduled 3-day fast went up in smoke. Once again I was super tired after my radiation treatment. I planned to take an hour nap then start on my chores (you know, keep busy so I don’t think about my rumbling stomach). Turns out I couldn’t nap. And when I tried to get up, I had no energy. So I lay in bed for a couple of hours  listening to my stomach get louder and louder.

There wasn’t enough water, bone broth or tea in my house to quell my hunger.

I broke down and ate a hard-boiled egg.

Yes I technically broke the fast with that egg, but the amount of food was so small compared to a normal day. I thought if I could hold out until the next morning I can kick my fast into high gear.

I chased the egg with 24 ounces of water. But my tummy persisted. Rather than spend the rest of the day staying close to the bathroom, I admitted defeat and ate dinner.  Read More


Fasting Fest This Weekend

frozen custard

This is what freaking out over your first radiation treatment leads to!

I planned to do a 5-day fast this week but chickened out at the last minute. Tuesday was my first radiation treatment and I was a bit too freaked out to try fasting. So I opted for some frozen custard instead.

Peanut Butter Brownie & Chocolate, to be specific.

A glorious LARGE one, to be even more specific.

Yes, I needed comfort food (told you I freaked out). No shame in that.

Thankfully, the freak out was for naught. The painless treatment lasted a total of 5 minutes. As for side effects, the only thing I experienced was some major fatigue. I did some serious napping for two days. Of course, I’m assuming it was the radiation. It could have been a carb coma from the big ass frozen custard. Read More


Be Happy, It’s Saturday!

coffee-owls

I woke up actually feeling like Espresso Owl. Why? I finally had my first awesome night’s sleep in about a week.

I feel like a weight’s been lifted. My doctor gave me the all clear to start working out again.  My healing is moving along nicely. I just have a few sutures that haven’t dissolved yet.

While I still need to take it easy, I can resume my training for a 10k and start lifting weights. Heck I’m even allowed to go swimming or take a bath.

I haven’t done anything for 7 weeks. Ugh! I’m so happy I’ve made a habit out of being active. I just can’t sit still anymore. It won’t be difficult to get back into the swing of things. The hard part will be the slow and gentle pace. My inclination is to go as hard or fast as possible. Not too bright. Last thing I want is an injury or screwing up my still healing abdominal area. I must be the turtle, not the hare.

But this weekend I’m focused on food prep, making meals for the week and a special project with the husband (minds out of the gutter!).  I’m spending part of this beautiful morning gearing up to run the gauntlet that is Saturday grocery shopping. May my Espresso Owl energy stay with me.

Which morning owl are you?


30-Day Challenge – Zero Carbs

meat

I’m going full ketogenic for July. No foods or drinks that come from plants. That’s right I’m doing a 30-Day No Carb Challenge. Let’s see if eating just animal foods is possible. Photo courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net and amenic181.

Well this should be interesting. I love my veggies, avocado, plum tomatoes, coconut oil and seasonings. But in the interest of my diet, I decided to give them all up in July. Yep, I’m going from 20g of net carbs a day to 0g total carbs.

That means no vegetables or fruits of any kind. No garlic. No leafy greens. No berries. No coffee or tea. No alcohol!!!!! No spices or seasonings, except for salt. If it comes from a plant, I’m giving it up in July.

Why am I doing this? Why not. Sometimes its good to shake things up. Also many LCHF folks experiment with this and many find it much easier to stick to. For me, the idea of giving up my morning avocado seems impossible, but I’m going to try.

What Can I Eat & Drink?
For 30 days the only foods I’ll eat comes from animals. Drinking is also restricted. Read More


The Great 2016 Clutter Battle

Office mess

My office/workout room AFTER we took out the king size bed. Yep, I’m battling clutter this week as I transform this space into something functional.

This week I’m starting to tackle all the crap that we’ve accumulated in my office/workout area. For months we’ve been storing junk in here and just recently we added a second litter box to the room – our cat doesn’t feel the need to walk all the way down to the basement when there is a perfectly good carpet on the second floor. Grrrrr!!!

I for one hate clutter. When I see it I stop focusing on my current task and start fixating on the mess. Since we had a few other important things to do around the house before taking on this room, I made the decision to stay out of the room unless I absolutely had to hunt for something.

Otherwise I’d go bonkers seething with rage that my beloved office turned into our junk room.

Plus I got tired hitting my hands, feet and head on my desk, sofa table and bed rails when trying to do yoga poses or using my resistance bands.

Connection Between Clutter & Weight?
I’ve read lots of stories that claim there is a connection between clutter and weight. But most are professional organizers claiming such a connection. Sort of self-serving if you ask me.

That said, I think there might be something to it. Certainly one of the first things I did whenever I started a diet was to “organize my kitchen and pantry.” Read More


Losing Weight In Public — Week 10

Last Week's Cookies

Last Week’s Cookies

Week 1 weight: 305 pounds
Last week’s weight: 287 pounds
Current weight: 286 pounds
Weight lost since last week: 1 pounds
Total weight lost: 19 pounds

I’m very happy about this miserable 1 pound. I was actually up in weight most of last week (yeah, I’m still checking between weigh-ins). I ate well, great food, and only messed up once with a margarita. It’s been several weeks since I’ve screwed up and went full-bore chocolate cake or something. I’m learning that weight fluctuates all the time, and that I need to just kinda/sorta fluctuate DOWNWARD and I’ll be fine.

Surprises

All my clothes are pretty loose now. What a difference 19 pounds makes. Still about 70-80 pounds left to get into freshman college shape, and honestly I’m not sure if I’ll get quite that far. Just because you lose fat, doesn’t mean you lose the fat cells themselves. Also, there will be extra skin. Dot and I are up for skin surgery if it comes to it, but not until we take off the weight, all of it, and keep it off. That said, “all of it” could realistically end up being only 60 more pounds, for me, bringing me to maybe 225. That’s a long road to travel one pound at a time.

Last Week’s Challenges

Same ol’ same ol’ — catering. I didn’t eat any of it, despite everyone feeling the urge to tell me, “There’s cookies out there…” I sort of look forward to it now, because I enjoy going out and taking a picture and feeling like a freak while folks from other teams grab goodies and stare at me. If someone asks what I’m doing, I’ll just say, “Ma’am, that’s classified.”

Then I’ll turn around smartly and walk away.

Into the shadows…


June Food Challenge: SEAFOOD

Fish cooking

OK, so the cedar plank did catch fire, but the dish came out awesome despite a little set back on the grill.

I got a jump-start on my June Food Challenge. Last night I made a macadamia crusted Mahi-Mahi with cauliflower mash and sautéed mustard greens. I had no idea what I was doing when making the crust. It really was on a whim and not thought out. I ended up topping it with a pesto sauce just in case the crust didn’t come out.

Why A Fish Challenge?
I’ve always hated fish. Always. When I was a kid I’d go fishing with my best friend’s family. I just remember being repulsed by how slimy the fish were and the whole cleaning process. Heck, to this day I still refuse to put bait on a fishing hook. The whole process is just icky to me.  And that pretty much drives most of my aversion to fish.

Most, but not all. Let’s not forget the fishy taste. Canned tuna always made me gag. And salmon…don’t get me started.

However I started rethinking the whole fish thing a few years ago when I tried sushi.  Yep, I ate raw fish…and loved it. No fishy flavor. I didn’t even mind the texture so much. Of course all that dang Wasabi may have had a hand in it, but it got me thinking.

Plus the health benefits. There is no way around that. I’m missing out on Omega-3 because of my aversion to fish. Taking fish oil just isn’t the same.

Finally my husband loves seafood. And it isn’t fair that he rarely eats fish because his wife is grossed out by it.

But eating fish is always hit or miss. Freshness is really important for a fish hater trying to become lover. I’ve had amazingly good Chilean sea bass and god awful salmon (Yes, I’m a bit like Ahab…but salmon is my Great White).

So June I’m making a serious effort to add fish to my diet. This month, twice a week, I’m eating seafood. Ultimately I want to be able to enjoy fish once a week after this challenge ends.

Fire In The Hole
My first attempt at grilling fish exceeded my expectations…despite the fire. The crust was a bit mushy going on but got pretty crispy (not burnt). Rather than chopping the macadamia nuts, I mistakenly pulverized them in my herb grinder. I basically turned the nuts into mush. In an effort to firm up the nut mush, I added my homemade salt seasoning (pink Himalayan salt, fresh cracked pepper, garlic powder and paprika) and some Parmesan cheese.

I ended up patting the crust mix on top and sides of each filet before adding them to the cedar plank.

Keep Calm & Eat Fish
Adding the pesto sauce was done out of panic. Again, this wasn’t planned out. I saw the fish at my grocery store earlier that afternoon and decided to pick up 3 fillets. The pesto sauce was just in case the crust or fish tasted bad.

The panic was for naught. The crust was yummy as was the pesto. And as for the fish…it was delicious. Mahi-Mahi was a good first choice for this challenge. My Wegman’s fishmonger recommended I start my challenge off with a mild white fish before working my way up to the dark and oil rich fish.

Apparently there are 5 types of fish.  So for the first few dishes I’m focused on milder white fish. That should help me get over hangups regarding texture and eating the skin before moving towards stronger flavored fish and eventually wild salmon.

As for the recipe, I tracked how much food I ate, but didn’t calculate the nutrition value of the fish dish. I’m working on that today and will post it later today.

I was too excited (and nervous) about starting this challenge to do some calculations. But I’ll make sure to have it ready to go when I post about my next dish: Steamed Muscles & Bacon-Wrapped Scallops.


Losing Weight In Public — Week 9

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Ice cream versions of the popular candies.

Week 1 weight: 305 pounds
Last week’s weight: 289 pounds
Current weight: 287 pounds
Weight lost since last week: 2 pounds
Total weight lost: 18 pounds

A great week has passed, with no restaurant desserts, no eating junk at my job, and probably too much exercise on Saturday and Sunday. I had to stain our fence to keep it fancy looking, and that required a lot of squats (to get the lower sections). Every time I squatted to do those lower sections, the blood dropped out of my head and down to my ankles, and I felt like I was gonna faint. Last night, I told my wife I’m going to do 10 squats a day and 10 pushups. Just something to keep myself a tiny bit more in-shape than just sitting around doing nothing all the time. Later on, I’ll add in more exercise if I feel like it (I might). But I really don’t like going to the gym. I’d rather do three sets of squats, pushups, go on walks, whatever than go back there and flagellate myself for 30-60. Again, we’ll see what happens once I start getting more exercise. One thing about me: I obsess a little. A little firmness in my legs and shoulders could chase me back to the gym to get even MORE results.

That was a long block of text, wasn’t it?

My former recruiter, Chad, is sort of a villain (with a heart of gold). He brought the ice cream seen in the picture for the team on Thursday. Someone yelled over my cube, “There’s ice cream up front!” and I tore off to snap a picture. On the way, Chad’s like, “Oh no, he’s gonna take a picture!” (he follows the blog).

Successes last week

Serving sizes. I kept my serving sizes realistic. And except for last night, I never had two helpings at dinner. I ate until I wasn’t hungry and then stopped. Last night, Dot made this ridiculously good pulled pork. It’s the best pulled pork I’ve ever had. Even better than the one she made a few weeks ago (she’s refining the recipe). No sugar, no sugar substitutes, either. You really don’t need them to make top-notch BBQ.

Challenges this week

Can’t think of any. I was telling Dot on Saturday how the temptation to eat junk at work is just about gone. People bring stuff in and I want it. If they bring sandwiches in, I sometimes take the meat out and plop a little mayo on it and eat it (it’s on plan), but that when the cake/cookies/ice cream comes in I don’t really feel temped. The pizza from 2 weeks ago was a real issue—but only because I was forced to be in the room with it for like 3 hours. And I still didn’t eat it.

Ok, that’s it for now. Yay me.


Weekly Weigh-In: Less Wine Means -1.5 Lbs!

weekly weigh in May 28

Make smarter decisions — less wine, make my own food — and the weight loss pick back up…amazing how that works!

It really is amazing what happens when you make better food choices. I’m down 1.5 pounds this week thanks to eating out less and cutting back on wine. Funny how that works.

This was also the week where I could consistently go outside and enjoy walks. The weather finally turned the corner and we said good-bye to lots of cold, wet rain. Since I’m no longer with a gym, my primary exercise right now is walking and interval running.

My eating habits and activity level are closely linked. On days where I can do a morning walk or jog, I’m much more mindful of what I shove in my mouth. So I’m grateful for the sunshine.

Grilling Season Is Here
More sunshine is in our extended forecast. When presented with the option of going out to eat or staying home and grilling, we normally opt to grill. So I’m creating a menu for the upcoming week that focuses heavily on grilling – Shrimp and Scallop Kabobs, pork and beef ribs, burgers and dogs.

And if we’re lucky on our excursion tomorrow, fresh fish. Yep, we’re going fishing in the morning. Depending on which spot the husband picks we might land a bass, trout or catfish. Read More


IVF, Hormones & Diet: The Balancing Act

weigh in may 22

So the weight gain thanks to my estrogen injections stopped…for now.

This week I bid adieu to my estrogen injections and (temporarily?) the weight gains. My weight held steady this week, and considering my hormones are all over the place, that’s a victory.

I still feel bloated and a bit moody … a bit like having PMS on and off for 2 weeks. Ugh!

Estrogen Injections – Mixed Results
(Warning: Female stuff ahead. I suggest the more delicate flowers out there read with caution or skip to the diet changes.) After 2 weeks of taking estrogen, the results were a bit mixed. On the plus side, the ultrasound indicated that my uterine lining thickened like it was suppose to.

On the minus side, while I was taking the estrogen, I noticed that the day following the injection, I’d start spotting. While it’s not typical to have vaginal bleeding during these injections, some women do. It turns out my estrogen level is lower than the doctor would like.

So now I’m 3 days (out of 7) into taking my new med – progesterone. The idea is that the new med will get my menstrual cycle properly regulated. About 5-7 days after my last dose, it will induce my period. Then the birth control pills start up.

Yep, I need birth control pills to get pregnant. Oh, the irony.

Then a saline sonogram and afterwards we might start the estrogen injections again.

Improving The Diet … & Bank Account!
On the diet front I noticed that I’m experiencing cold hands and feet on fasting days. What’s up with that?

I have too much of a calorie deficit on non-fasting days. Seems strange since I only eat when I’m hungry. That means I need to retool what I’m doing by upping my protein back to 6 ounces per meal. I cut back to 4 ounces months ago. Sure enough, I started feeling colder not too long after cutting back and just didn’t put 2 and 2 together.

I’m also making a sincere attempt at adding more fish into my diet, eating it twice this week. In June I’m going to start a seafood challenge – eating fish 2 times a week. That means I’m on the hunt for recipes as culinary skills in this area are severely lacking.

Besides improvement on the fish front, efforts to cut coffee from my daily grind are going well. This week I only enjoyed the Black Java during the weekend and limited myself to 2 cups in the morning. I expect by June I’ll be so over coffee.

As for cutting my ties to wine, I’m making progress there too. We no longer have bottles at home. But when I go out for dinner, I have a glass or two with my meal. I’ve essentially created a habit. Normally I’d consider this a little indulgence rather than a habit. The problem is we’re going out to eat far too often – 4-5 times a week! That’s a lot of wine.

And its wrecking havoc on our bank account (cost of restaurant + wasted food at home = stupidity). It also kicks me out of ketosis since my body burns the alcohol before any fat. Not to mention the sugar in wine is getting stored somewhere.

It also can’t be great on the hormone front either.

I don’t want to set foot in a restaurant until June. And even then I’m limiting eating out to twice a month. That way its more of a special treat.