Keto Reset Day 16: A Late Night Victory

Yesterday was a bad day. I woke up cranky. I don’t know why. But dang it, I was not someone not to be trifled with.

Well my mom woke up in a similar mood. I should have saw it coming the day before. We briefly chatted about giving up her apartment and looking for assisted living arrangements. The last time we had this chat, she was an emotional wreck for a few days. I should have learned from that…but I didn’t.

Now she was on a mission. And it was going to be accomplished. Period.

We headed to her apartment to get her wedding ring set. Perfectly reasonable…but that doesn’t mean that “Cranky Dot” liked it.

However she wasn’t 100%. Her arthritis was bad this morning. Every move was painful. She felt really tired – I thought she was still recovering from a cold. And her breathing at times was labored.

There was a lot of walking involved to get to apartment. Much further than she has walked since breaking her hip. Physically she overexerted herself.

But there was the emotional side of this trip too. She was overwhelmed. Coming back to her apartment was hard. I think she is really starting to understand that she won’t be living her again. But wanted to prove herself, and me, wrong.

The result was a way too stressful day…for both of us. Tempers flared at times. She had a lot of near misses and almost ended up on her backside. So of course my frustration mounted.

After spending all morning together, it was time to get her to her physical therapy and a much-needed break for me.

Don’t get me wrong. Any other time we spend ½ a day in close proximity to each other it is a very good day. We have fun. But today, was a special supersonic black hole of emotional mess for both of us.

Mindfulness vs. Wine & Chocolate Pudding Cake
So what did I do? I was hungry and went out to eat. Yes I ordered low carb – a bun-less bacon cheeseburger with a side of grilled broccolini. Perfect. Until the wine showed up.

Before ordering the wine, I pulled out my phone and turned on my meditation app. Surely there was a 2 minute meditation to take help me relax in a busy, loud restaurant.

Maybe…but “Cranky Dot” wasn’t falling for it. Soon “Cranky Dot” morphed into “Self-Pity Dot” and she ordered one more glass…and was eyeing the chocolate pudding cake.

Thankfully “Keto Dot” appeared and stopped me half way through the second glass and turned my attention to the full water glass on the table. I ended up drinking 2 of those.

About 90 minutes later, mom was ready and I picked her up. She needed to rest and went up for a nap.

Emotionally spent, I scrapped plans for cleaning out the basement. I thought the drama for the day was done. While I was upset I ordered those 2 glasses of el vino, I was happy I pushed that damn cake out of my mind. Plus, my first reaction was to turn on my meditation app. It didn’t work this time, but I did reach for it first!  So it was a partial victory.

Evening In The Emergency Room
Unfortunately the day wasn’t done. A few hours later mom had a bad fall. She was reaching into the closet for her robe and fell backwards. Besides worrying that the bad hip might have a crack, she hit her head…hard.

The next several hours were spent in the emergency room, waiting for the CT scans, x-rays, blood work and lab results. Thankfully no breaks…just a lot of bruises. But her iron levels are too low. She can’t absorb iron that well thanks to her bariatric surgery many decades ago. Which looks to be the cause of her tiredness, shortness of breath and sluggish movements.

While waiting for the results I had a personal victory. Over the last few months, any visit to the hospital always resulted in a trip to the vending machine. When you are a stress eater, quality of food doesn’t matter.

Last night. I wasn’t interested.

When we got home very early this morning, I experienced another victory. I made a small meal for mom (she missed dinner). The hubby pulled out a small box of wine that I use for cooking. He poured me a glass. I said no thanks and went to bed.

Refusing wine…granted it was crappy box wine so not too difficult to pass on. But all things considered, it still is a small victory.

Keto Challenge Day 9: Weight Loss!

keto week 2Whatever bug I have kept me up most of the night coughing and sneezing. Although my energy is very low this morning, I had enough to pull myself out of bed and stumble onto the scale.

Weight wise I’m down, despite a couple of missteps last week. At the start of my reset I weighed 232.3. Today I’m at 230.8. Not to shabby.

No doubt my low appetite over the weekend (thanks bug!) contributed to my loss. So I look at the numbers with a very skeptical eye. Despite the lack of sleep I am feeling a little better today as my fever broke earlier this morning.

Practicing Mindfulness
As far as getting back on track with keto, I need to correct the problems (stress induced eating & drinking) from last week.

While convalescing in bed this weekend I made an effort to use my meditation app. Of course, it was easy since I was sick in bed…I mean how much stress is involved with that! Still, it’s good practice. Any time I felt frustrated that I couldn’t do anything, I reached for my phone and listened to some calming sound or music.

That put me right to sleep…almost as good as NightTime NyQuil.

How Dot’s Getting Her Weight Loss Groove Back

Well after not really trying to lose weight, I'm at 185 lbs. this morning - the same weight I was at my physical earlier in the year. Time to take a look at my goals and refocus my efforts after a 3 month mental break.

Well after not really trying to lose weight, I’m at 185 lbs. this morning – the same weight I was at my physical earlier in the year. Time to take a look at my goals and refocus my efforts after a 3 month mental break.

Well since August I’ve struggled with my push to drop my last 30 pounds. My tracking is spotty at best. Weighing and measuring food? Almost non-existent. How about counting carbs? I keep a mental record, but if I’m not measuring my serving sizes or tracking what I eat, how good can my carb counting be, right?

Yet, I feel fine…and a little guilty.

Time To Re-Think My Goals
As of this morning I weigh 185 lbs. So I’ve lost 4 lbs. since my doctor told me I was healthy and didn’t have to drop anymore pounds.

Now, I don’t believe for a second that my body is at its set point. I think I mentally started coasting once my doctor told me I was healthy and didn’t need to lose any more. After all, I started this adventure in 2012 to get healthy. The weight loss was a great side effect.

But that got me thinking: Do I need to reconsider my goal?

When I shifted my thinking from weight loss to getting healthy, the weight came off. Yes, I track my weight loss on this blog, but the overall goal was health.

Well, I’ve done that. Now what? After my physical, I never asked myself what’s next. I just thought “happiness” is my new goal. Crap!  What does that even mean? I just thought I can drop 30 more pounds and be happier. Why 30? I have no clue. Read More

Weekly Weigh-In: Nothing!

Despite the travel over the last couple of months and lots of stress eating, I've stopped gaining weight. Time to get back to basics and become a fat burning machine.

Despite the travel over the last couple of months and lots of stress eating, I’ve stopped gaining weight. Time to get back to basics and become a fat burning machine.

The good news is I’m holding steady despite a pretty stressful week. The bad news, I saw a bad habit – stress eating – come back with abandon. Ugh!

So this week I’m going back to basics. I’m working on a simple menu – just tried and true meals without a lot of moving parts. So plenty of eggs, steak, healthy fats (in the form of sauces, avocado and butter), and some leafy greens.

I’m also starting to cut back — way back — on my coffee intake. I was up 8 cups a day and my water intake dropped significantly. Of course, with each cup of Joe I added 1 teaspoon of heavy cream. I ran into problems with cream before. When I cut back, I started losing weight again. This time I’m limiting myself to no more than 2 cups of coffee (all decaf by the way!). While this limits my cream too, I’m still going to try to enjoy drinking my coffee black.

Time To Get Moving Again
Since the end of August I haven’t been able to exercise as consistently as I like. I know that exercise doesn’t cause weight loss, but I tend to eat smarter when I’m working out. When I don’t workout, I start feeling restless and that can get me into trouble in the kitchen.

I’m headed back to my parkour gym this week. After my first 2-hour class, I haven’t been back due to my travel schedule and just too much going on at my house. My plan is to take the 90-minute intro to Urban Fit (weight training) and the parkour class for folks over 35.

Oh, and despite the cold weather I’m walking everyday.

Lots of muscle soreness is headed my way this week.  Yay!

Make Stress Your Friend

Image courtesy of and David Castillo Dominici.

Image courtesy of and David Castillo Dominici.

Working on a project yesterday, I started feeling a bit stressed out. I stepped away from the computer and took a little walk. Within a few minutes I felt better and came up with a solution to my problem.

It’s a far cry from when my only stress-busting technique was a walk to the nearest vending machine. And even then, it was just a quick, short fix. Soon after munching on Doritos, not only would my stress return, but also guilt over eating crap. Which prompted a walk to the soda machine. Ugh! Read More