I’m up 7 pounds the last 2 weeks. Time for some soul-searching this weekend and I think I put my finger on the problem.

I didn’t get a chance to officially weigh in on Saturday as we had a surprise birthday party to attend. That didn’t stop me from stepping on my home scale. Before I stepped on it I knew the news wouldn’t be good. Just too much wine and eating out the last two weeks. My suspicions were spot on. I’m up 7 pounds. Ugh!

Maybe the weight gain is what pushed me to get the Fitbit One this weekend. All I know I was on my best behavior during the birthday party…until the red velvet cupcakes showed up. In my defense, they were teeny tiny. I took a small bite of a cupcake and feed the rest to my husband. I did this about 7 times…

So going into the birthday party I was feeling awfully frustrated with myself. Once there, we met up with old friends we haven’t seen in ages. I got so many compliments on my weight loss that my perspective on my gain started changing.

It’s so easy to miss the forest through the trees when it comes to weight loss. I’ve come a long way the last two years. I’ve had a rough 4 months and that goes with the territory. Screw-ups are expected.

But I keep telling myself that I’m back on track. Clearly that’s not the case.

I did some soul-searching this weekend. It finally dawned on me that I’ve mentally coasted since getting off my blood pressure meds and losing 100 pounds. I heard a little voice tell me “I’ve got this. No need to measure or track my food all the time. I know what I need to do.”

That’s pride messing with me. If anything these last 4 months have shown I don’t know jack!

Sure I lost a lot of weight, but I didn’t stop and think about what I needed to do to keep going. It was as if 100 pounds loomed so large in my mind that I completely forgot that I had another 75 pounds to go.

Unbeknownst to me I ended up taking a (much-needed) mental break. Between blogging about my weight, increased workouts, constantly thinking about food, I essentially experienced burn out. I lost 100 pounds and promptly I hit the snooze button.

Now it’s time to wake up. What I’m doing is no longer acceptable. What got me to my current weight isn’t enough to help me reach my goal. I needed to push myself more.

My bad health drove the first portion of my weight loss journey. Now I need a new motivation…and I think I found it yesterday.

After a 3 mile run and 3 mile walk, I was pretty sweaty. Before jumping into the shower I took a hard look at myself I the mirror, something I haven’t done in a while. For the first time, I didn’t see the flaws and bulges. I saw muscles that seemed to miraculously appear overnight. I noticed definition along my arms, legs, stomach and back. I saw the positive changes my body’s undergone. And it made me crave more.

This week I’m refocusing myself. That means new goals (not all weight related!), reinforcing good habits and being truly excited about my journey going forward – something I haven’t felt since my physical earlier this year.

I know I’ll continue to have slip ups (hopefully not that many), but mentally I’m in a good place and thrilled going forward.